Technology, Schmechnology...

I lost my cell phone..... Not necessarily a life or death situation; however, I do not have a home phone so it is my sole form of communication within the confines of my home or car. What pissed me off more than loosing my phone was loosing the enormous phone book I had entered through the past few years... Valuable numbers like the cab company that only cost $5 to take me and mein Deutscher home from the local bar.... Can't recall the name of it, just know it is a small, local company. Gonna have to research that one.

So after a few years of having the same phone (a 1990's sedan if you will) with very few bells and whistles,(hey, I could play Tetris while being stuck in line at the bank or such) I upgraded to a shiny, sleek, red sports car complete with all the latest gadgets. To be quite honest, I could live without all the hoopla... What attracted me to this particular model is that it is red... And shiny... I am a sucker for things like that....

I got this gleaming, glossy piece of technology on Saturday. I charged the puppy up and went through the awful task of recreating my phone book. Tedious... That is the only word I can use to describe the horrific task at hand. The German has many of the same contacts in his phone and I was able to get those taken care of... Next, I tap out an email to others that I am missing... Lastly, I have the ghastly job of actually looking up numbers either on anywho or in the phone book. Success!

After my laborious evening of being "all thumbs" with my input, I decide it is time for bed. Somewhere around 5am I hear beeping... Huh? What the hell? It rouses mein Deutscher as well... After shaking the cobwebs out of our heads, we realize it is the shiny red thing I have painstakingly programmed to my specifications... I pick it up and the damned battery is dead... Not just low; completely freakin' dead. I think to myself, maybe it needs to charge a protracted period of time... Maybe I gave it too much credit when I read the words "charging complete" across the display... I plugged it back in and crawled back into bed for another couple of hours of Zzzz's.

Day two - I know it has to be okay because the phone has been on the charger for twelve - count 'em, 12 whole hours. I have not used it for anything the entire time so as to allow the battery to suck in all the electrical nutrients it requires to sustain my need for a communications device.

Night two - Bed time... I take the (hopefully) trusty, red trickster and place it gingerly on the nightstand whilst we sleep....

Wanna know what happened at 5a?? The son-of-a-bitch made another loud noise and , dead... Again.... Completely, utterly dead... Not a glimmer. Okay, now I am REALLY pissed!! I am not going to let it win even if it is shiny!

Later in the morning I trounce back over to the Sprint store from which it was "born"... Damn it, it is Memorial Day and they are closed. Damn, damn, damn... Stuck with this freakin' phone that decides it wants to check out each day at 5a... Really pisses me off....

Tuesday - Pack up all the hoopla that comes along with the vixen and throw it in the car. Go to work, leave work and drive to the Sprint store... Get a new phone that, thankfully, they reprogram all the numbers for me. I was told that occasionally there are "bum" batteries from having sat too long in the back of the shop. Okay, it is a fluke, I get it. Gimme the new red thing and let's get on with it. Get in the car and drive home. Put the cover back on it and guess what? The damned thing only works with the cover off. Fine. Covers? We don't need no stinkin' covers! We need a phone. That works.

Tuesday night - Did as I was told... Recharged until it said "charging complete"... Never touched the stupid thing again until I picked it up and placed it on the nightstand for bed time. Wanna know what happened at 5a? Well either way, you are about to find out... It died... I plugged it in before I left for work and charged it in the car the whole ride here. I haven't touched it since. It has one measly bar showing and I am certain it will moan out it's (now)infamous death wail before I leave for home... Oops, I mean the Sprint store for red thing number three....

The Places You'll Go...

Omigosh! I DESPISE traffic!!! The other day I thought I was going to die... Here I go down 40 in the second from the left lane when the Honda starts making a noise that made think the transmission had just dropped out. First things first, I turned off the radio and realized something was not just amiss - something was really, really wrong.

Naturally the first thing I think of is get in the shoulder (preferably the right one). I put on the blinker (for those of you that do not know where it is, it is that stick on the left of your steering column, use it please) and looked in the rearview mirror. What to my wandering eyes should appear? Rubber flying off my car... Not just little pieces, but CHUNKS!! Is anyone letting me over? Hell no...

About a mile into this nightmare (while my rim has now made an appearance - I can tell by the sparks coming off behind me) two truckers block the right lanes and signal me over. Finally on the shoulder I do the only thing I know to do... I call mein Deustcher... I don't know why I am calling him because he was in Lexington; however, he is my hubby and a mechanic to boot. After he calmed me down, I called Daddy. He hopped on the road and I got out of the car to assess the damage.

Mentally I go through the check list of what I need to get the tire changed while rifling through my trunk. After I take note that I found my black Coach bag I find the spare and jack. Yippee! One step closer to moving my happy ass down the road. Daddy calls and says he is five minutes away when salvation appears via a TDOT Sprite colored truck. Why Sprite colored you may ask? Because to me it is lemon-lime, that's why.

In less than ten minutes this kind Metro employee has me ready to go, free of charge I might add. Bonus! Something I am not concerned about my tax dollars going towards - even better! Of course I wrote a glorious letter exalting my hero... Daddy offered him a 20 for his troubles but he declined saying he was not allowed to... Wow, someone with integrity as well.

What was bad got better with help... Now the Honda and I are back on the road and oh, the places you'll go....

What's a girl to do?

Have you ever said something to someone and regretted it the moment the words left your lips? I told a friend what someone said about her and her husband... Now mind you, the comments I repeated were from five years ago... That was well before they were married... It was a not something that I thought would create such "DRAMA"... My friend went ballistic - no, seriously, ballistic! She called her husband and he too was angry. Now mind you, maybe I should tell you that my German works with her husband and the person who originally told me the comment from five years ago is our husband's boss' wife... Confused? Hope not, work with me here.... So literally the German and I were thrown under the bus because my friend's husband went off and told the boss what I repeated...

People, get with the program, the comments were from FIVE YEARS AGO!!! Let me set the record straight as well.... The person to whom I made the comments consistently talks about other people... Any person is fair game and it is the pot calling the kettle black with her getting upset, especially in such a dramatic fashion. Do not get me wrong, I too am guilty of talking about people behind their back... Quite frankly, who is not?

So what's a girl to do? The German is very upset; however, he does not want me to talk to the friend who created this stir, nor will he allow me to apologize to the boss' wife.... What a quandry...

What am I thinking?

Like I really do not have enough to do in my life... I decided that I needed to add a bit more to my already full plate and create my own blog. I have no clear cut motive nor any crazy ambition... Just this ridiculous notion that this would be "fun"....